人和人之間的關係的確很微妙,在結識朋友/男女朋友/和家人相處的立場上,每一種人也有他/她的魅力和「市場」。
你跟甲沒有很多話題,但他竟然是在朋友堆中是一個頗受歡迎的人。我們其實大多數都有「不明白為何有些好朋友竟然會跟我們心目中的怪人/衰人做朋友」的經歷。另一例子,就算你覺得乙是個無可救藥的無賴,他也會有幾個兩挾插刀的知己或百般遷就的男/女朋友, 所謂的「人夾人」和「冤豬頭都有盟鼻菩薩」,就是形容這些情形。
要記著,只是你覺得他有問題。
每個人也有不同的價值觀和待人接物的標準,和有自己的一套「值與不值」的理論。當我們觀察一個人時,其實下意識會衡量他的好與不好。你覺得朋友丙的女朋友對他很差,你替他不值,覺得他應該值得擁有一個更好的女朋友。這只是你將自己代入他的角色去衡量得出來的結論。其實世上沒有一個人會做他認為沒有好處或不值得的事。所以不用替任何人不值,值與不值不是你說的。另外,千萬別過份相信其他人對某些人的評價, 你可能在一個犯眾憎身上發掘出優點。
兩個人的連繫其實像拼圖,不是每塊都可以拼在一起,姑勿論是情人,朋友,同事,或甚至家人,要剛好是「一凹一凸」,才是大家的絕配。
i sometimes saw those hot guys having below average girlfriends.
ReplyDeletecan't say i am jealous of those girls. just wonder how come it can't be the same in "my community".
OMG共鳴post!!! 太多太多例子了!!! 當然對於一個人的評價通常都是主觀論點, 只能說物以類聚, 這是我的解釋. 至於朋友的另一半, 最近也在我的圈子發生了, 内容不多說, 認同的只是人家的快樂不快樂, 是我們不能用自己看到的去衡量. 對嘛?
ReplyDelete這一篇,終於吸引到我這個CD-ROM出黎留言。
ReplyDelete人夾人,真的很微妙,也真的很吊詭。
從自己眼中,身邊有些人做了許多「壞事」,也會朋友一大堆,擁有美滿生活呢~
不過正如你所說,只是「我」覺得他有問題⋯⋯
有時候真的葡萄起來。
lol ozzy this comment is a bit shallow !
ReplyDeletejk
whats it like in "ur community"?
glad u loved this entry and glad we have similar mindset on this topic... actually 物以類聚 is quite true, but like i said in this entry, sometimes i wonder why a "weirdo" or a ba$tard could get close with some good frds of mine, they r definitely not the same type of people, but sth in them just click.
ReplyDeletehello Joe, im glad you liked my entry enuf to leave a comment!! yes... sometimes i feel "jealous" although not the usual jealous feeling, but just dun understand why someone can get sth that i think they "do not deserve".
ReplyDeleteabout 「壞事」, really, who's to judge?
definitely more shallow than my comment. lol
ReplyDeletei dunno. maybe it's just hk. most guys evaluate each other by their look. and wouldn't spend more time on someone if their look don't match with their "level". wouldn't try to talk and get to know.
their defense is that "look isn't everything. but it's what helps u attract someone's attention first."
well back to the subject, now that i don't feel too strong about "為何有些好朋友竟然會跟我們心目中的怪人/衰人做朋友". maybe i have 睇化. lol
some ppl are just open minded. some see "friends" as a part of their social life. some keep connections for benefits.
u know i have got a straight guy friend. time after time he got weird guys chasing him, or at least showing interest, or "keeping track" of him. sometimes i wonder how can he not cut contact with those weirdos.
so it really depends on how one dealing with their social life.
anyway i am reminded of this funny quote i have heard of: "Everybody is somebody else's weirdo."
fuck, i am defiantly everyone's weirdo
ReplyDelete